Today is a significant day. It feels like a three month stint on the front line came to an end yesterday. I feel drained and relieved, satisfied and a little cut and bruised. The last couple of weeks I have been pretty focused, head down and task orientated, bent on reaching the finishing line but not really seeing much further. Today was feeling pretty similar, I have the astounding ability to be focused and driven even about doing nothing in particular! I am grateful for the little nudge I felt to stop and be present with God in this new day.
As I look back over the last three months, its been amazing! I am able to see there have been some great wins in this section of the front line; nothing perfect because I brought my wounds and flaws, my blind spots to each situation. But even that triggers a gratitude that comes from deep within me, my heart is thankful to God for his love and grace. I am reminded that it’s the things that we do Him last forever, not because of any great quality we might think we have, but simply because of his goodness.
I love that even when it feels like we cant see the next step, God is still unfolding his purposes, and when we look back on the path we have come by, the journey actually does make sense. I love that one person knows that God knows him, that another one knows that he has a family, that still another has found something worth giving his life for. I love that a small team is preparing to give up 3 weeks of their lives so that teams in Bali and Sumba can be trained to bring life to their communities. I love that the organization I am part of, which is really just a bunch of mates who count each other as family, is learning to talk and listen again after a complex two years. I love that God is moving and acting and unfolding his plans, and though they often don’t make a lot of sense when I am in the midst of them, there is one thing of which I am certain; they are good.
And so with a grateful heart (which I am learning is one of the secrets to having a hopeful heart) I have come to the end of one phase in the battle and I am looking forward to a week of rest, walks, red wine, movies and good food with my friend, Joy.